Saturday

We went bowling for the second time in two weeks. We were comparing bowling alleys. But we haven't really reached a good conclusion. The first one had nice new shoes and balls, but bad service. The second one had old bad balls that weren't even labeled with sizes, but everything and everyone seemed to work pretty well. Both alleys rely on ancient scoring equipment. (Not pencil and paper ancient, just ancient as in from that time where a Star Trek-like array of buttons was considered really neat-o, even if you had no idea what the buttons were for. Plus there aren't any graphics of dancing pins.) My bowling skills rival those of my skills in any other athletic event, meaning I have none. But in 2 games, I met my goal of only bowling one 0 frame, plus I got a strike and a spare in the last one.

Then later something strange came over me, and I decided we would go to a karaoke bar. (Don't worry nothing THAT strange came over me - I wasn't going to sing, of course, just to see what it was like.) They had one of those arcade games with the claw that you're supposed to aim to pick up the toy. You know, the game that drops the toy no matter what, the one that no one is ever supposed to be able to win? Well, guess what? I won! I won a puppy dog, in a Bills outfit for Joe. I just walked up there to play one game, and I didn't even end up having to pay because the lady ahead of me seems to have thought the game cost twice what it did. And then I won! The karaoke part of the evening was a little slow. There was only one person that ever sang. He wasn't a bad singer, but, like all of Bingbong, he was very old. Thus, we were treated to the greatest hits of the '40s. Then we went home, with my new puppy dog, who is now sitting next to me cheering on his team.
- posted by Darcey @ 12:51 PM

 
I know a hospital employs a much wider variety of people than I have been working with the past few years. What I did not know was that this apparently includes a contingent of small children lacking their own common sense or common courtesy, so that the following rules need to be specifically quantified for them in the company "standards of performance". (Note that several of these are part of a recent addition, so you know they must have been added because someone actually had a problem with them.)

-I will always use "please" and "thank you".

-I will always practice the 10-5 Rule. When approaching someone in the hall, I will smile at them when we are 10 feet apart and say "Hello" when 5 feet apart.

-I will keep my recorded voice mail message concise, using the hospital phone script.

-I will practice good personal hygiene to prevent odors from perspiration, bad breath, and smoking.

-Personal use of the e-mail (yes, it says "the" e-mail) is permitted, but such use is limited to sending personal e-mails to no more than 3 people a day. (Note to anyone who may construe me as criticizing my new employer on the internet: I'm not disagreeing with any of these principles - I just find it funny that they need to be spelled out and quantified - and I'm sure this is for the benefit of a very small group of people.)

-There is an entire section devoted to "Elevator Etiquette". Who knew it was more complicated than "get on, push button, get off"? Or is the world of hospital elevators really truly as complex as seen on TV - Grey's-Anatomy-style, where entire relationships take place in the trip from one floor to the next (similar to middle-school-style ,where entire relationships take place in the space of a passing period)?
- posted by Darcey @ 9:59 AM

 
Un-housewife observations:

-Should I be concerned about the quality of the health care provided by my new employer if, when I arrive for their required TB test reading, they sign off on it without even looking at me?
-I believe my new employer is conspiring with the department of transportation to make sure I will never be able to get home once I get there. The way to the hospital is easy, but the other way - first, they closed the bridge in the homebound direction. Now, they are digging up my detour.

Housewife observations:

-If the dishes come out of the dishwasher dirtier than when they went in, the dishwasher really isn't being very helpful.
-I baked banana bread. I've never made a bread-like substance before.
- posted by Darcey @ 2:24 PM